Questions...

I am always questioning everything when it comes to being a parent. I don't just want to be a parent...I want to be an amazing, inspiring, loving and effective parent. A lot to live up to, right?

Mom says this has always been my personality. If I choose to do "it", whatever it may be, I do it to the very best of my ability, even if it takes every ounce out of me to achieve my goal. Believe me, I want to be the BEST. If I don't choose to do it, it's because I think I'm not good enough or it isn't enjoyable. Therefore, being the kind of parent that I want to be and that Justin seems to be naturally, takes a lot of effort, thought and deliberation.

Case in point, can you over-schedule a toddler? Lane isn't even 2 years and I keep his schedule on a calendar. I seriously can't remember from week to week where we are supposed to be and at what time. Gymnastics at 9:45, Kindermusic at 10:15, story time at 10:00, playgroup at 9 and which event is on which day?!?! It occurred to me this weekend that we have ONE free day each week. ONE!

Fortunately, we have been blessed with a very intelligent little boy who loves to learn and be active. Even more so, we have been blessed to be able to take advantage of the opportunities to challenge him intellectually, creatively and physically. But I wonder, are we setting the stage too high too early? Are we always going to be able to keep this pace and is this not going to create burnout? Is the variety of activities going to hinder him in school in a way that school might be boring and monotonous? And am I expecting too much or am I seriously over analyzing the situation. (Justin accuses me of this way too often which places more question in my mind. Vicious cycle!)

Regardless, Lane is a very busy, happy little boy. For now, he loves every activity and excels at each one. He sang a full song to me today. I love to hear his voice and watch his little mind at work. I also feel such pride when everyone, and I do mean everyone, compliments Lane on his manners, behavior or advancements. I can't help but thank God a million times a day for such a precious little gift and for more guidance everyday to be the kind of parent He commands and also that Lane deserves.

No pictures this week, we're too busy going and doing to break out the camera. I just had a lot on my mind today and this became my outlet. Hope everyone is well and happy!

Much love,

Nikki